The Most Rediculous Crossover Story EVER! xD
by SuburbanDisneyPrincess
Summary: READ: This is a comedic crossover brought to you by me and fwforever...with some contributions from my sister. This is not only harry potter and twilight. it includes Wicked, the play Equis, and warrior cats... ENJOY! I do not own any of these things!


(Starts with Glinda the good witch introducing the story)  
Whole cast sings to the tune of No One Mourns the Wicked:

"Good News! He's dead! The Dark Lord of England is dead! The wickedest wizard there ever was. The enemy of all of us here in the world is dead! Good news! Good news!"  
Luna appears blowing bubbles and Glinda follows in her giant bubble.

"Fellow Osians, It's good to see me, isn't it? No need to answer that was rhetorical." Glinda says.  
(Song continues with Glinda singing)

"Let us be glad. Let us be grateful. Let us rejoicify that goodness could subdue the wicked workings of 'You Know Who'. (ect)

*Back to Earlier That Day*  
Edward enters Volterra with the hopes that Aro and the Volturi will kill him because he thinks that Bella is dead… again. He taps on Aro's chair 

"Aro?" he asked. 

The chair slowly turns counter-clockwise and the Dark Lord is sitting in Aro's chair with Wormtail on his lap… not as rat, but the fat ugly person he truly is, drinking from a baby bottle. Wormtail and Voldemort spit the milk out of their mouths in shock. 

"Cedric Diggory!" Wormtail screeched as he leapt out of Voldemort's lap. "I thought I killed you!" Edward looked around to see if anyone is with him.

"Hello, my name is Edward Cullen, I'm looking for Aro. Do you know where I can find him?" 

"Avada Kedavra!" Voldemort yells, pointing his wand at Edward. A big green light flashed. Edward looks around.

"That was a really nice flash, and all, but can you just tell me where Aro is? You never answered my question. Maybe you could point me in the direction where he may be." Edward said.

"Why didn't you die, Cedric?!" Voldemort yelled.

"Not really sure who this Cedric person is, but it seems to me that you have a great deal of animosity towards him… Not his biggest fan, I guess. But, as I said before my name is Edward Cullen, I'm a vampire." Voldemort continues doing the killing curse as Edward continues what he was saying as if it was just a flashing green light.

"I live in Forks, Washington, U.S.A. I'm not really sure what the zip code is, we don't mail letters that often… uh, it rains a lot and umm…" Then, Allen Strange, who randomly appeared singing his Milky Bar theme song, cut him off. Every stopped and stared at him. He then ran away.

"That was odd, he wasn't thinking of Milky Bars at all." Edward said, referring to his mind reading powers. Then before Voldemort could speak, Jacob Black in wolf form and Sirius Black in dog form leaped through the windows of Volturi Castle. There was a very long awkward pause. Both dog/creatures disappeared for a moment, then came back in human form, Jacob in cut-off shorts and Sirius in pants and a jacket. Both of them say

"What's your name?" at the same time. Then they both said their names at the same time.

"Whoa!" Jacob said.

"This is amazing!" Sirius yelled.

"I can't believe it!" Jacob yelled.

"Oh my god! I mean how many people have the name Black! (millions) We must be related! It's like, the most uncommon name ever" Sirius said.

"We're definitely relatives! Like, no one has the name Black" Jacob said.

Voldemort then calls for reinforcements. Bellatrix appears with Lucius and Draco Malfoy in a cloud of green smoke. Just as the rest of the Death Eaters appear, the rest of the order of the phoenix and the Cullens appear with Bella, "alive" as a vampire. The Death eaters start fighting against them. Even though the Cullens don't have magic powers, Alice is dodging the spells she sees and Edward doing the same by hearing the thoughts of people casting spells. Jasper attempted to calm people down.

"OhEmGe what's up with her?" Rosalie said stopping and pointing to Hermione.

"Her hair is a mess!" Alice said.

"Well, if we're aloud to make this a musical, then I can fix it!" Glinda said appearing out of a fog of bubbles.

"I'll check." Alice said, pulling out an oversized book titled **Rules Of Adding Thing to Completely Pointless and Utterly Pathetic Fan Fiction Random Crossover Stories**.

"Oh," Rosalie said, looking over her shoulder. "We need to have at least 3 songs to make a musical."

"Well we can deal with that later." Glinda said. Alice, Rosalie, and Glinda start singing popular and make Hermione pretty. Dobby, Kreacher, and Jasper started tap dancing as they sang. They all left to make Hermione pretty. Then during the mayhem of Wizards and Vampires fighting, blasts of light and bright explosions, a man dressed in all green appeared.

"Silence!" He yelled. It echoed through the hall. Everyone stopped and looked at him. "I am the Great Wizard of OZ!" He yelled. He looked around. He didn't really notice all the real wizards in the room until that moment. "I mean.... uh... She's the Great Wizard of OZ!" He yelled, pointing to Luna, and ran out of the room like a little girl. Luna stood there smiling and waving. The fight started again in an instant.

"Bella! Fight back! Come on!" Voldemort yelled. Bellatrix looked at Voldemort and nodded. Bella stopped and looked at him too.

"Bella lookout!" Edward yelled. Both Bella and Bellatrix looked at him.

"Wait!" both Bellas yelled.

"What's your name, girl?" Bellatrix asked eerily.

"B-Bella Marie Swan C-Cullen. A-and y-you?" Bella said, a little scared of the horrifying wizard.

"Bellatrix Lestrange, escaped prisoner of Azkaban." She said in her evil, laughing voice.

"Could people just call us by our full names so this stupid fight could be much less confusing?!" Bella yelled.

"Whatever, Isabella." Voldemort said.

"What, what kind of name is Bellatrix? London people are weird!" Edward said. And the fight went on. Then, the rest of the La Push wolf pack as wolves followed by Professor Lupin jumped through the already-broken windows of the castle.

"Hey Lupin, why are they all wolves and your like... not?" Ron asked scratching his head.

"Elementary, my dear boy... Well, not really. It's not a full moon... and even if I was a wolf right now, you would all be in great amounts of danger." Lupin said smiling.

"Well, that's pleasant to hear." Alice said, entering from where she had left with the other girls. "Okay now may I present to you, a pretty Hermione!" She yelled, gesturing to where she came from. Hermione walked out... looking like Lindsey Lohan in the SNL Harry Potter Sketch.

"Whoa..." Ron said staring at her, wide eyed. She smiled at him.

"HA!" Bellatrix yelled pointing her wand at Hermione. A gold light flashed and Hermione looked as she did before.

"Okay, never mind." Ron said.

"Oh! There goes all our hard work!" Rosalie yelled.

"Now how will we get rid of Voldemort?!" Ginny yelled as she fought of a death eater.

"I will save you all!" Harry yelled, appearing out of nowhere.

"Hey aren't you that creepy milky bar kid?" Edward asked Harry.

"Um.... no? Wait, Cedric! It's you! You're alive! Oh my goodness what ha...." Harry was cut off by Edward yelling "THATS IT! I DON'T KNOW WHOT HIS CEDRIC PERSON IS, BUT IT'S NOT ME! STOP CALLING ME THAT! MY NAME IS EDWARD CULLEN!"

"Gosh, chill dude." Emmett said.

"Okay, well, TIME TO SAY GOODBYE, VOLDEMORT! THESRTY, GO!" Harry said throwing a black and white pokeball in front of Voldemort. It opened and a Thestral appeared.

"Thresty, Trample!" Harry yelled pointing to Voldemort. The thestral trampled over Voldemort for 30 minutes straight as everyone watched.

"Thresty, return." Harry said holding the pokeball out. The thestral dissapeared into the pokeball.

"He's... dead." Jane said, checking his pulse. Some random Volturi Guard members appeared and took Voldemort's body away.

"Well, that solves that problem. By the way, where's Aro anyway?" Edward said.

"Yeah, and where's Professor Dumbledore?" Hermione said.

"Here we are." Dumbledore said, entering along with Aro, Caius, and Marcus, all drinking Starbucks.

"Sorry, the only human snack vampires can have is coffee, and I love my Starbucks." Marcus said.

"So what did we miss?" Aro said.

"Forget it." Everyone else said.

*Flashback to end of No One Mourns the Wicked*

"Well, we still have some time left so please enjoy The song Warrior Cats performed by... well, the warrior cats." Alice said. The cats from Warriors began to sing "Jellicle Cats" but instead of Jellicle, they said Warrior. Then, in the middle of the number, Firestar suddenly stopped. inched into view.

"Evil!" He said, pointing to Ms. Norris.

"Get her!" Ms. Norris ran off very quickly. Firestar chased after her. The other warrior cats followed.

THE END!!!


End file.
